12 Of 12

I know this post is on the 13th, but the hotel internet wasn't playing ball and I had a promise to keep...

This really shoube be 12 of 12 x 1 as this is my first ever 12 of 12. Yes we virgins still exist! Anyway onto my day and for those of you who know what I do for a living, well these pictures have been selected to be appropriate to all who may be wandering the internet.

For those of you wanting to try it and follow our decent into madness you can particiapte by first reading Chad's Blog.

Enjoy.

1. 06:45 approx.

This has been my home away from home for the week. A small room in a Travel Inn on the Outskirts of Eastbourne. Loving the lovely purple theme going on.

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2. 07:00 approx.

To get to the restaurant for breakfast you actually have to leave the hotel and cross the carpark. I was always the first one into breakfast, hence the reason it was still dark. I was at work for 07:30 every morning.

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3. 07:25 approx.

My trusty steed. This is a works van and is exactly like all other vans, slow and smells of cigerettes. It has a top speed of 70mph (80mph down hill) and the windscreen washer jets are on strike. I could actually walk to work from the hotel, but I couldn't carry all of my tools.

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4. 10:00 approx.

My current place of work, Eastbourne Crematorium. That's another I can add to my list of "Crematoria of Europe" I have visited.
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5. 13:00 approx.

Lunch time! I had a choice of Tesco and Sainsburys today. I'd frequented Tesco's for most of the week so I decieded for a change. Nuff said really.

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6. 13:30 approx.

I call this the Architects nightmare. When designing a crematorium I always feel for an architect. No only do they have to restrain there creativity without being bland, they must ensure they have one of these. There are only so many ways you can hide a large chimney.

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7. 15:00 approx.

This has been my other home away from home this week. I took this picture before I packed away my tools. And yes it's as cramped as it looks.

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8. 16:30 approx.

After all my hard work this week, this is all I have to show for it! I sliced the back of my hand open with a screwdriver. What's the point of a scar where nobody can really see it?

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9. 18:00 approx.

This is the view out of the back of the crematorium and was a chance to test the ability of my camera at night. You can just make out a church in the background, but you can't see the graveyard in the foreground. When working late I sometimes have to walk through a graveyard.

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10. 18:30 approx.

In Memory. This is a sight that always greets me when I drove out of the crematorium on an evening.

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11. 19:15 approx.

I went out for a walk on the seafront. Yes, I was out in the gales I must be mad! This is my attempt to photograph the pier, which was all nicely lit up. I won't give up my day job I think.

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12. 20:00 approx.

Back in the hotel and I thought I'd pay tribute to those things that have kept me sane over the week. I'm gad I don't work away from home all the time as it can get very lonely.

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There we have it my first (slightly late) 12 of 12. Only 11 more to go for the year. Wish me luck!

Colour me Fushed!

Well, er...

...not quite. Before I get into the latest installment of the soap opera of my life I'd just like to wish everyone the best for 2007. May all your dreams come true, except one.

This year I decided it would be the year I re-decorate the bathroom. If there is one room in the house that really needs it, it's the bathroom. The house obviously decided this as well and decided to give me a little push in that direction. My toilet has devolped a small leak and I got back to find my carpet was sodden with water. This has obviously been going for longer than I thought as the carpet was funny colour on the underside when I pulled it up to inspect the floor.

Eww!

So I spent yesterday evening drying and cleaning the bathroom and I'm currently staying at my parents until I get it fixed this weeked (i'm then going to proceed to rip out the carpet). And just like the six million dollar man I'm sure it can be rebuilt. The plan is to install new taps on the bath, tile the floor (waterproof) and tile the rest of the wall that currently isn't tiled. If i'm feeling really handy, I might just straighten out the bathroom cabinet which surprisingly hasn't fallen off the wall since I put it up 18 months ago. But is still as crooked as ever.

However work is trying it's best to get in the way of my plans. After my glamourous trip to Strasbourg before Christmas, I have an even more glamourous one lined up. Next week I'm working in the elephant graveyard known as Eastbourne. I'm testing a machine that was damaged by fire just before christmas. And before anybody asks I don't think it was due to overuse either.

I've decided to travel Sunday to give me more working time and to catch the M25 on a 'good' day. Which is why I need to get things fixed on Saturday. I may also get back at a reasonable time on the Friday as well, although pigs may of course be soon landing at Heathrow! Apparently we work £4200 a year of unpaid overtime and I can quite well believe it.

I know what my overtime is going to pay for! ;-)

Happy New Year Folks.

Tales from the Bourg

... as in the Stras. Not as in "Resistance is Futile"

Yes it is I! Having returned from visiting our European cousins, I find myself 2 weeks behind in my preparations for christmas. It's unbelievable how quick christmas seems to have snuck up on us this year. Or should I say, snuck up on me. Today for instance, I only just finished writing out all of my cards. I'd have usually have done this days ago. If I hadn't been ahead of the game and done my christmas shopping before I left I would definately be in trouble by now.

It doesn't seem like I was away for 2 weeks either. The time just seem to have flown by. Maybe that's because we were working for 12 hours each day with a 45 minute drive between the site and the hotel (each way). I don't think I have ever worked so hard for such a long period of time. And to top it all off...

...the bloody thing still didn't work by the end of it all.

There were times when I phoned the office over the last 2 weeks and my first words were "The French shouldn't be allowed to build things". The biggest thing was they built it in the wrong place. Which is a particualr problem when the item in question weighs around 20 tonnes and has had all the ancillary equipment positioned and fitted around it . It was only 4 inches out of alignment, but that is enough to make the machine virtually useless. It took a day to move it the requeset distance..

After it had been moved there was a big hole in one side. Without going into too much detail, this hole is the equivalent of having a hole in the side of a straw when you are trying to have a drink. The French solution, was to stuff it full of heat resitant wool and bugger off.

We then had a usuable machine, which needed to be run-in for 3 days before it could be used properly. So we ran it for the requiset number of time and then when we came to use it...

... the door failed. It failed open, letting all the pent up heat (all 700 C) of it out into the room. Melting various fixtures in the process. The emergency release handle failed when we pulled it. In fact it could have been one of those TV comedy moments as the cable on the emergency release snapped leaving the handle in our hands. It took them 3 days to fix this and by that time it was time for me to leave. As far as I know the machine still isn't working.

Overall the job wasn't the best in the world and there were point's where I wasn't particulary happy during those 2 weeks. The French don't have a monopoly on silly mistakes though. I made the mistake of taking a wrong turn on the way to site one day. That doesn't seem to bad until I tell you that if I hadn't realised I would have been driving the wrong way down a German motorway!

I did manage to get into Strasbourg on one day though. It can be best described as "Very Quaint". A lot of it looks like Ye Olde England in place with whitewashed buildings with wood panelling. The Christmas decorations though were superb. The tree in the square is huge and nearly all the streets around the centre are lit up with a different set of lights.

One street has a set of lit chandeliers strung between the shops. Each chandelier is made of real crystal as well. Those decorations muct be worth a fortune! It was packed as well when we went in. Strasbourg and the market are very popular this time of year. That was why our hotel was in Germany and we were commuting into France every morning.

I also saw a French Beaver *snigger, steady boys* which I never expected to see while emerging from a French multi-story. If you can keep yoursleves calm here it is:

The Beaver Shot!

Finally I returned home to find my heating and my hot water were off. The boiler has broken down again and guess what? Yep, you guessed it. The same part which failed last year has gone again. Looking at my records it has failed after 1 year and 5 days. The warranty on said part lasts 1 year.

I think you can guess which company received a very stongly worded email yesterday! ;-)

Merry Christmas Everyone!

It's a Small World After All.

I'm still here!

Yes to quote just about anybody "You know what they say bout best laid plans..." It's not our fault this time though. The customer hasn't finished the actual building yet and doesn't have the necessary clearence from the French Government to cremate. So they asked to postpone it a bit...

... and then an email popped into the inbox this moring from our French office. Basically they expected to be ready for week 52 and they wanted an engineer sent then. Week 52 is exactly as it sounds. The last week of the year. Our reply to that was a firm, but polite "Fat Chance". I'm sure that would sound much more
poetic in French.

Next week is still a go though. I travel out to Strasbourg on Monday from Manchester Airport and won't be back until Friday 15th. So I'm away for about 12 days. There has been some trouble finding me a hotel at the moment because the Chrsitmas market starts in Strasbourg this weekend. Apparently it's VERY popular
and lots of people go there to visit it! I 'm keeping my fingers crossed I get to stay somewhere local.
I'm actually looking forward to it. I'll hopefully get some free time over the weekend to visit the market and maybe get to other places as well. My only worry is that the job has a few problems and I don't get any free time.

Given that I thought I wasn't going to be in the country for 3 weeks (inc. this one). I told the agency not to sort out anymore introductions until the New Year. So in true predictable style, the details of my next introduction landed on my doormat 2 days later. Typical. Still now that I had this week spare, I actually had the time to meet her before I went to France. So last night we went out for a Curry (her choice) before going on to a bar (as we got chased out of the restaurant). I had a really nice evening, we basically talked for most of it (apart from when we were stufing our faces). I'm sure we could of talked all night if it wasn't for the fact we both had work the next day.

I thought me going to France for 2 weeks would be a problem, but in fact she was quite happy to meet up again when I get back. She is actualy very busy anyway during the next fortnight, so it's ideal really. Do you want to know the really amazing thing...

... I actually knew her housemate about 18months ago, but had never met her before last night. It was only during a phone conversation on Sunday night, when I mentioned the ATC, that she actually mentioned she used to live in York and that her housemate was also an ATC instructor. When the truth emerged there were cries of "Oh my God" all round.

How small is this world getting?

The Wonderful Thing About Tiggers!

Good Evening Folks!

I can defiantely say I'm much more perkier at the moment than I have been over the last 3-4 weeks. I'm still suffering with my sinuses, but I've now been switched to a stronger set of Antibiotics as well as a nasal spray. Add that to the fact that my boss was back at work on Thurday, which has really lifted a weight from my shoulders. So overall I have every reason to feel perkier. I certainly feel more awake.

I decided to blitz the house today, which is something I periodically do. So it was dusted, washed, swept, bleached, mopped, vacuumed from top to bottom. Once I started I just didn't stop. After lunch (yes that was before lunch) I went out for a bike ride while the weather was dry (but boy was it cold). I decided to ride on to the next village just to see how far I could get. It's only 3 miles away, but what I didn't take into account was that it was mostly downhill on the way there. I got there thinking "That was easy" and then on the way back all I was thinking was "bugger"! I helped myself to an extra slice of malt loaf after that one.

Looking back on the week, we also had our Annual Formal Inspection at Cadets this week. Basically that's when 2-3 higher ups visit the squadron. We then get rated on everything from our paperwork to moral. They can be very picky. I mean, we got marked down for not having any "No smoking" signs in the building. We don't allow smoking in the organisation for crying out loud. Still we got full marks for moral if nothing else. :-)

My trip to France saga took another twist this week. As you know I was supposed to be there this week. Well it looks likely that I'm now going out to France on Moday 27th for 5 days. Not to bad except...

... I have the weekend and then it looks like I'll be going to France again (Strasbourg this time) for at least 2 weeks. That's going to mean I'm away for half of Decemeber. So I'm either going to have to be really early or really late with my Xmas shopping. Do I dare leave it late in case I'm in France for longer? At least work have given me some warning over this one. Still it's this sort of thing that plays havoc with my social life (what little of it I have ).

Speaking of social life I have a little news. I went to meet my first introduction last night. It was a last minute thing as she'd just finished working nights and I wasn't in France. We went out for a Thai meal which was ratehr nice and we bascally chatted the nigth away. It was a nice evening, but at the end of it we decided that we both weren't what each other was looking for. I can't believe how nervous I was at the start as well. So I'll be going on to the next introduction, although not until I get abck from France probably.

But it makes me wonder, would I even know what I'm looking for, even if it's sitting right in front of me? Or am I too slow to realise these things. I guess we'll find out. It makes me wonder how many opportunites we let slip by because we don't realise they are there...

... or because we weren't willing to risk something.

Oh and blogger keeps telling me that V2.0 is now up and running. Should I be switching?

I want the last week of my life back.

Have you ever had a week where it has taken you the entire weekend to recover?

I can honestly say that this week has definately been one of those weeks! We have just had so much to do at work this week I couldn't believe it. Although I could of guessed it would happen the week when both my boss (paternity leave) and Stuart (who is the tech guy for customer support) were both away. I haven't worked so hard since I joined the company nearly 3 years ago.

I can't believe it has been that long! Where has my life gone?

I basically worked until they locked up the offices on a night. Got home, ate, then went to bed. I have never felt so tired. What made it worse was the fact that I'm currently on Antibiotics for a sinus infection. I won't say anymore, needess to say it's not nice. I can't wait until I can take some time-off from work.

I did all that work mainly because I was supposed to be in France next week. However my trip to France got pushed back by 2 weeks (I got told this on Friday) because the French have yet to get the gas connected. They don't half know how to mess up my life as I'd cancelled all my plans for the following fortnight and planned stuff for the following weeks.

Arrrrggggh!

My boss comes back to the office on Thursday next week and I can't wait. I might be able to get some of my life back before I go to France.

Anybody willing to place bets on if I can manage it?

Forget the Taffic Camera...

... an immovible object is the best thing to get idiots off the road anytime!

Yes I know I probably complain about driving at least once a month, but with this video I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. These are CCTV footage taken from Manchester City centre where automatic bollards have been installed to allow certain vehicles to cut the corner on the one-way system. This means buses, certain delivery vehicles etc...

... freezing out the common Manchester motorist who now has to take the long way round. Either to manage traffic or just to make the city centre a safer (read: awkward) place.



Speaking of traffic management they've installed new Traffic lights on a roundabout on my way home from work. Specifically to improve traffic flow for all of the different roads that connect to the roundabout. All I can say is well done [/sarcasm]. Instead of just one queue of traffic waiting to get across the roundabout there's now two . The lights have the worst timings ever and they are actually set quite away back from the entrance to the roundabout. In summary my journey home now takes an extra 10-15minutes longer.

In other news I talked to my first introduction from "The Agency" today. Unfotunately she's on nights next week and I'm away in France the week after so we're going to get back in touch as soon as I get back. I might be less nervous the 2nd time.

Maybe. ;-)

I Surrender!

I haven't started yet, but already I've given up. Yep, I speak of that soul destroying phenomanon known as NaNoWriMo. Although the "Times Crossword" does come a close second. With my current schedule for November reading something like this:-

• Tuesday + Friday nights: - Air Cadets
• Thursday nights: - T'ai Chi
• 1st weekend: - Manchester
• 2nd weekend:- free + packing for...
• 10 days in France with work coming back for...
• final weekend: London (for 2 Xmas get togethers).

So with my boss due to start Paternity Leave, anytime now, there is no possibility of taking some time off this month either (and god knows I could do with it). This basically leaves me with 5 evenings and 1 weekend to call my own. I'll probably get some free time while over in France, but that I'm counting as a bonus. I'm actually going to a town in the Alps on the Swiss/France border area. It's called Chambery and is approximately 60 miles west of Lyon.

However all is not lost. I'm planning to do something I'm calling Nano-lite. It's like Pepsi Max, but without the crummy adverts and checmical additives. It's not going to be 50,000 words, but I'm sure I can do something smaller in the free time that I can spare it.

So that's what the rest of my evening will be taken up with mostly...

... in other news going back to that essay of a post a made a month ago, I recieved information from"The Agency" about a possible introduction this week. I can't give any details at the moment (confidentially and all that" but I rang the other person this evening, but only got the voicemail service. On which I left the most god-awful message.

I'll tell you now ringing-up a complete stranger (whose existence is only known from a sheet of paper) is one of the most nerve racking things I've ever done.

Thought for the day: Everything in moderation, including moderation.

That Was The Weak That Was...

Erm, well like a week really.

Definately a week of high's and lows. Starting with the big low. My bosses father unfortunately passed away on Thurday morning after suffering a second stroke. My boss came into the office that morning saying things didn't look good. And sure enough 30 minutes later his mobile rang. Unfortunately as we share an office there's not a lot of provacy, and he's too polite to tell me to "piss off" so he picked up his mobile and wandered to the empty office next door.

Sure enough he came back in about 10 minutes later and all he said was "I'm going to go home". Now I knew as soon as his phone rang what was going to happen yet in the 10 minutes he was out the office I couldn't work out what to say to him. Even when he came back in all I could reply was "Fine, no problem." Awkward doesn't begin to cover it. He returned to the office today and was slightly less akward now that he's starting to talk about it, but I've generally tried to avoid starting that particualr conversation. My only concern is that it might be seen as dis-interest on my part.

What makes it even more akward is that his wife is due to give birth tomorrow actually to there second child. So we'll be losing him to paternity leave shortly as well. This tends to be a happier topic of conversation, but there are moments where I catch a look of fear in his eye when he talks about.

I'be been rather impressed with myself this week on the amount of fitness trainingI've managed to do. As well as the cycling circuits I managed on Wednesday, I attended two, 3 hour sessions of T'ai Chi this week. The first was on Thurday night which is my usual training night. But there was also an extra session on saturday morning as well.

This session gather's together students and their teachers from all over the leeds area (inc. Huddersfield) so it's quite a gathering. I really enjoyed it. The class seems so diffrent when there is about 40 people, rather than the 8 we usually get on a Thursday night. Our instructor was the guy who I've come to call Yoda on these pages. I can definately say my fitness has improved since starting these classes. From what looks very easy on the outside, it's amazing how hard you work when it's done properly. For example, try walking across a room while taking a single breath. The 'in' breath should be continuous for about 15 seconds and then the outbreath should last for the same amount of time. At the moment I can control an 'in' breath for 11 seconds and an out breath for 18 seconds.

And to top all that off I cleaned my enitre house from top to bottom on Saturday afternoon! Go me. I must admit I had let it slide a little, but things are all spick and span(ish) again. Needless to say I was total shagged (technical term) by Saturday evening. So I treated myself to some of those huge Cookies from Tesco's and sat down and watched a DVD Saturday evening. For those of you who are interested I watched Munich for the first time. I would recommend it, but I'm still slightly unsure as to the ending.

Sunday saw me decide to go shopping in Leeds. To cut out the problems of hunting for a car parking space I decided to take the train. Those of you have been to Micklefield station, know it is basically 2 small platforms with a bus shelter on each. The train was supposed to arrive at 10:12 it still hadn't arrive by 10:32 and all I got when ringing National Rail enquires was the automated message "Signal problems between York and Leeds" Eventually I gave up waiting and decided to drive in after all

I offered a lift to the only other person on the platform. We'd only exchanged a few words, but I felt I should offer her the chance as she was trying to make a connection at Leeds. What I didn't expect was that she'd accept! So we walked back to my house and I gave her a lift all the way to leeds station. Considering we'd only spoken a few words of exasperation on the platform, we got on quite well, having a continuous conversation all the way to Leeds station. At one point we got talking about friends and I mentioned about meeting most of you guys on the net.

She asked how it was I could go out and meet total strangers that I'd only ever met and could trust them not to be "completely nuts" as she put it. I had to smile, but I held back my comment about the fact that she'd accepted a lift from a complete stanger and we hadn't even exchanged names until we were half way back to my house. I dropped her off at the station and seh said she hoped that she "would like to bump into me again". It was nice getting to know her it's a shame I don't know where she lives and how to contact her. Who know's maybe we'll bump into each other again.

Do I have that much faith in fate? We'll see!

We're Surrounded Sarge.

"Don't worry men we'll fight them to the last!"

Well after lull where I thought I'd chased them out of the house. They're back! And this time they are bigger than ever. That's right I'm currently in the middle of the second spider invasion of the year. My tally for the last 2 days is 4 and each one has been of the long legged variety that come into my "freakin huge man" catagory.

I hate to say it, but I'm still exercising a "kill on site" policy, especially with these speedy buggers. If I didn't I very much doubt I would eb able to sleep at night knowing something like that was scuttling around my room. In fact I've caught 2 in my bedroom, 1 in the hall outside my bedroom and one ran out from underneath the couch I'm currently sitting on.

If I was the paranoid type, I would be wondering what mackes me more attractive to arachnids, rather than to members of my own species.

In other news... er... nothing much really. I went out cycling this evening and did circuits up and down the nearby hill (it was too foggy) to go to far. In fact now I come to think about it, it's been almost perpetual fog around here for the last few days. I live in a sort of valley and every morning and evening this week, I've driven out of the fog to work. Then, I've had to come down one side of the valley, back into the fog to get home again.

Maybe the government is doing genetic experiments on spdiers under the cover of the fog?

My Departed Parting!

There's always the same problem with a blog. How can you update it when there's nothing to update it with? I got my wish. My weekend was lovely and peaceful, with no rushing around, stressful phonecalls and not even a burnt piece of toast to remind me of work. I think the most exciting thing was probably the fact that I got my hair cut!

Don't laugh, this is a big event for me nowadays. Due to the fact that my hair is growing backwards, I go to the barbers less and less these days. This was also the first visit that didn't require them to cut my fringe, mainly due to the fact that it no longer exists. *sob*

Maybe I should post it's Epitaph:-

Andrew Ellis' Fringe
1980-2006 Aged 26
Gone, but not forgotten.
He is still with us, in our hearts &
on my driving license!
No wig will ever replace him.

I just I keep enough of it to gain some grey hairs. I've always wondered what I'd look like with grey hair and I'm hoping some of it stays around long enough to change colour.

On the subject of hair, do you know what really annoys me. Razor adverts! Being forced into using a manual razor has meant they now piss me off more than usual. The advert shows the razor gliding over some blokes face with no resistance whatsoever and then brags about how good it is. The reason it was so easy was the fact that blokes face had been waxed and polished before the advert. Either that or Gillette has a genetics program that allows them to breed genetically hairless men. It was probably an offshoot of the program to breed kittens for people allergic to cats!

Eitherway he had no stubble and therefore was in no need of a shave. I situation I would gladly like to be in. I'm sure my chin is missing 1/2 inch somewhere from that razor of mine.

Anyway maestro drumroll please.

[/drumroll]

I came across this the other day while cleaning up the files on my laptop. This is the first anime music video I ever made. This was when I was at uni and had the time to sit down and compose such things. It's depressing song I know, but if you ever watched the anime it was based on (quite apt really as it was about young girls discovery of herself on the internet!) then you'd understand how well the song fits the anime.

Enjoy: ~

5 Day Stretch

I'm back, finally. Well to be honest I've been back for a few days, but I haven't really been "all here" if you know what I mean! But like all good stories we'll start at the beginning. I always find it's the best way. Although one of these days I promise I'll tell you a story that begins at the end.

As I mentioned on Tuesday there was a last minute decision to send me upto Scotland to fix some problems at a new job. This is probably my single biggest grudge with my job. When things don't get planned correctly it's usually muggins here that goes out to pick up the pieces. Such was the case with this job. I know of at least one other job that due to planning problems will require me to go out again. But I've got a bit more warning about this one, mainly due to the fact that it means I'll be out in France for a fortnight!

Anyway, back to Scotland, to a place near High Blantyre (just South of Glasgow. It was one of those annoying jobs, other people haven't done there jobs properly, I go up there and they just leap out at you immediately. A lot of it is technology that's new to the UK and it's all about getting it rght now, before we have to install lot's of this technology in the next few years. Environmental regs are tightening up and technology has to be added to at least 50% of all sites to bring them into line.

So I got back from Scotland on Friday, upset everyone with my report, before heading off to my weekend training course with the ATC. It was the BASIC instructors course which all 18 year cadets need to take and is recommended for most instructors. The course ran from Friday evening to Sunday evening, covering everything from Abuse, Drug to Duty of Care.

It was a decent course and one I have to take before I apply to become a uniformed member of staff. There were 4 adult instructors and 10 cadets on the course and there were other courses on which meant that the total number of cadets was 140. The cadets were aged 14-18 and under strict restrictions. Thankfully there were fewer restrictions on staff, which makes giving up a weekend for the course much easier to swallow.

Which leads me into this week. Where I have been suffering from cold all week. My nose feels like it has been blocked up by concrete and on Monday & Tueday night I came home, had something to eat and basically went to bed, when I couldn't do anything else. My head is starting to clear, but this didn't really help on Tueday. My boss had to dash off early as his dad had a massive stroke and was in intensive care in Liverpool. I took all his workload for the day and ended up leaving work really late. I missed cadets, which was annoying as we had a VIP turning up and he squadron needed as much help as possible.

I'm hoping the later part of this week will settle down. I could do with somedays where nothing happens. For a change anyway. ;-)

Anime Music Video (AMV) of the Day: ~

The Rest of It...

Although the weekend actually started on the Friday for me. I took the day off (mainly in response to working my butt off, while my boss was away the week before). So in the words of the immortal Homer S ~ "Woohoo 3 day weekend!"

Friday was basically jobs day. I travelled into Leeds to take my electric razor to be fixed. I know it's been awhile since that actually broke, however it took until last week to convince the manufacturer that it was actually broken. Trying not to be too sarcastic, but when you press the "on" button and the device remains "off" that fits my description of "broken". I've had to leave it with them, but the bloke at the counter basically told me that the "Washable Razor" wasn't actually water resistant!

Bit of a design flaw methinks.

I also pre-ordered a Wii (yes pronounced We). Going into a shop and asking for one of those is probably just as embarrasing as blokes buying condoms or tampons. For those not in the know it is the next generation game console from Nintendo. I admit it, I'm still a computer game playing geek, but seen as how I don't smoke or drink, I need at least one vice.

The rest of Friday was basically filled cleaning the house. When I clean, I clean everything. So that took most of the afternoon. The evening saw me travel west to Manchester on the daily carpark known as the M62. To be fair tt wasn't that bad, however for those poor souls travelling east, let's just say ti would of been quicker to travel by camel.

The rest of my weekend was spent in the delightful company of Dave and Simon, where we discussed Wittgenstein over a game of backgammon...

... okay we spent the weekend eating lots of junk food, watching sport and playing computer games. We did attempt the Times Crossword and we did leave the house to go into Manchester (resulting in my previous entry). But overall it was an enjoyable weekend. Hopefully I'll have a few more before November which promises to be a bsy month!

That's a new one...

... excuse that is!

The excuse in question was "I'm sorry mate, I just got up too early this morning." Why is it that even though you've never met them, some people still insist on calling you mate? Anyway back to the excuse in question. These were the first words of the guy who ran into the back of my car in Stockport on Satruday lunchtime. Luckily there were no dents, but the paint work at the back of my car is now scratched and scuffed.

To be fair he was very apologetic about it all. I need to find out how much it is going to cost to fix and then send him the bill. He doesn't want to go through his insurace company he was desperate to keep his no clais bonus. Something I can sympathise with having lost mine once already.

Still what an excuse eh? There are a number of really angry and cutting remarks that filled my head at that point, but I frankly didn't see the use in venting any of them. The damage (literally) was already done. I just wished he'd stayed in bed rather than get behind the wheel of a car. My back bumper is a paltry thing compared with... maybe a child instead.

Lyrics of the Day:

So tomorrow there will be another number,
for the one who had a name.
A desert wind and a perverse desire to win,
history buried in shame.

Are those beating drums,
celebration guns.
The thunder and the laughter,
The last thing they remember.

And then the next day,
how will you know your enemy,
by their colour or your fear.
One by one you can cage them in your freedom,
make them all disappear.

Are those beating drums,
celebration guns.
The thunder and the laughter,
The last thing they remember.

Goodnight, sleep light, stranger

Celebration Guns ~ Stars (I like the whole song, so sue me!)

The Price of Happiness

Most of today has been spent watching the single matches of the Ryder Cup. Being a Golf fan (for my sins) I couldn't really be expected to do anything else. I was amazed at how well the European team played and my congratulations go out to them. Also I must admit that there was a tear in my eye when Darren Clark won his match on the 16th. It's incredible how well Darren was playing considering it wasn't so long ago that he lost his Wife to Cancer.

When I wasn't watching the golf I finally finished piecing my bike back together. I bought a seat on eBay (where else?) and I can quite happily report that it is a much better design for the male form. It's actually filled with that Gel-type material and it is much more comfortable to ride with. I took the bike out for a test-ride up and down the hill a couple of times just to make sure everything is okay. With no problems I'm just hoping for some nice weather towards the back end of the year so that it doesn't just sit in the garage until next year!

I suspect you guys are probably wondering what I alluded to in my last entry. I suspect it wasn't (partially) what you thought. It should be interesting though.

I really don't meet many (any) new people. Between work and all of my evening activities I must be honest and say I don't get out much. Mind you "going out" has never been my scene anyway .If I go anywhere it's usually to meet friends and I just don't really have those kind of "friends" around here. I have friends at work certainly, but I'm the youngest person in the office at the moment and it's very rare that I see anybody outside of work.

All of my real close friends are you guys who have had the delight and fortune to meet via the internet and university. Just imagine those of us who live at the four corners of this country (and the globe), would we have gone on with our lives not knowing each other without the internet?

Now before I go any further these thoughts aren't as depressing as they probably read. As I type there is a smile on my face and it is a situation I have learned to at least become comfortable with. However these are thoughts that have been running through my head these past couple of weeks. I have been wondering what happens now? How do I move forward...

... Well what I actually did this weekend was join an "introduction agency". Bet you didn't see that one coming did ya? Knowing my situation and wanting to become pro-active I thought this to be a possible solution. So on Saturday I went for an interview to join the agency. They interview all potential clients to assess there suitability and obviously to get details as to what people are looking for.

The agency (I'll keep calling it that as it makes it sound like something out of a spy novel) was in the middle of moving offices so they were actually based temporarily in a suite in the Marriot hotel. They were also running late as the hotel staff had forgotten where they had put them and were directing clients the wrong way.

The interview actually went on for 2+ hours. I won't say too much about it, most of the questions would be as you would suspect. What was interesting though was the use of psychometric testing similar to those used by an employer. I had to smile while doing those. Every time I've done one of those I've upset the person assessing them. People like to use them to pigeon hole you to one category or another. Generally I get scores that put me equally in them all, prompting a "I'll get ye yet cully" look in there eyes.

The second interesting thing is the conversation that occurred when the interview moved in the direction of my occupation. I obviously told her I was a Software/Commissioning engineer, but it was the subject of "on what" that we ended up talking for ages on. I'm always amazed how people want to know more on the subject. I suppose deep down people have a morbid fascination for it, that they just don't realise is there until they have the opportunity to find out more! I think my company should advertise it as a perk of the job.

Anyway after going through all that I am now a member of "The Agency". I'll admit here and now it's not cheap. Erm membership is a 4 figure number and I'll just leave it there. Will it be worth it? I won't be able to answer that question yet, but I'm hoping that turns into a definite YES in the future.

So what happens next? Well obviously all my information goes into the system and then we wait. They promise upto 16 introductions in a year (if you need them) and it usually takes about 3 weeks before they send you details of the first one. When things start happening, I promise you my friends will be the first to know. I'm going to be as completely open as I can be on this and I suspect I'll be all the happier for it!

Wow, I've just re-read this lot and it's a monster of a post. If you've got to the end - you deserve a cookie. And if you remind me nest time you see me, I'll be very happy to oblige!

Profound Lyric of the day:

Sacred geometry.
Where movement is poetry.
Visions of you and me forever.

Dark Waltz ~ Hayley Westenra

Typed in Blood!

I just love a dramatic post title. Don't you?

Never has a post title been so apt in this case. At the moment my eczema is playing havok with my hands. The skin is all cracked on my fingers and it was so bad earlier in the week I caught a slight infection as well. So they become all swollen which made it difficult to type, also bending certain fingers opened up parts of the skin...

...causing the phenomenon described in the title. So I've been avoid general keboard usage whenever possible this week. Which has been a bit difficult with work seen as how it's part of my job and all. I've tried to stick to the task that don't involve typing, but i'm the only one in the office this week (my boss is on holiday), so I've had to take on what I've come to call emergency typing.

Of course this has also meant no blogging etc when I got home otherwise I'd have no fingers left. Although I wouldn't have to worry about blood stains as they would just blend in with my sofa! Thankfully the swelling has gone down now and I can flex my fingers without it turning into a scene from A Nightmare on Elm Street.

Thankfully (?) it's been a slow news week up here so you haven't missed out on much. Only one noteworthy tidbit. Last friday we took the cadets on a night time exercise on Strensall Common which is an area of land the Army use for exercises. There were 10 staff members and 60 cadets. Anyway at the end of the evening we got back to where we'd parked our cars to find that a member of staff had lost there car keys somewhere on the common. Not only that but somebody else had put there car keys in this persons car for safe (??) keeping.

Oh dear! It's 11 in the evening pitch black and the common now contained tall grass, bushes, tree's, ditches, swamps and 1 set of car keys. The common is about 3 sq. km and we had 70 people. Needle, haystack, whichever way you look at it we had no chance. I don't know how they got into the car as we had to leave before then. I suspect if we'd have enquired one of the cadets may have had the necessary "skills" to "help".

See I told you it was a slow news week. I may have somethign slightly more interesting to post about on Saturday. Depends on how things go and how... er ... open I'm feeling.

Thought provoking lyric of the day:

When it all comes crashing down,
And the prayers move in to town.
Bring your floral words,
Wrapped in selafane.

Richard Ashcroft ~ Sweet Brother Malcolm

Trying Hard to Keep it Up...

... my internet connection that is!

What I forgot to mention in my last entry is that on friday evening we took the cadets to York Maze. Cut from fields of Maize (definate pun intended there) it is the size of 15 football pitches. Every year it is cut into a different design and this year it had a Star Trek theme (it being the 40th anniversery and all). It's actually really good and there's an arial shot if you follow the earlier link.

The reason we went last week was because they have started there Halloween activites. Yes I know it's early but the rest of the Maze (Maize) get's harvested before Halloween and they have to do it sometime before then. As you would expect they have people positioned round the maze in halloween costumes and it is open until 11pm in the evening. The best bit were the blokes in hockey masks running around with real chainsaws. You could hear them (and the screams) from the other side of the Maze.

I love scaring cadets. It's one of life's little pleasures.

Speaking of scary things, today I was sat in my office which faces the main road when suddenly there was this loud bang from outside. I peered through the blinds to find a lorry parked by the side of the road and a mangled lump of metal on the pavement slightly behind it. It transpires that the twisted lump used to be a bus shelter. The lorry was transporting it (it didn't look very secure) and then it suddenly fell off the back (I don't know why). The driver was very lucky, I suspect that if there had been anybody on the pavement at that time they'd be dead (or at least seriously injured).

I've also never actually heard of a bus shelter being vandalsied before it was even installed!

I went cycling this evening for the first time in ages. I didn't go too far (just up and down the hill a couple of time). I would probaby have gone further if it wasn't for that seat. When I called it a device of KGB torture last week I was doing it a definate injustice. Although it's not so bad as finishing Alias season 2 which I did on Monday Night. That ends on an even bigger cliffhanger than the first season. What's worse is that you in way can see it coming, just because it seems to have nothing in common with what's gone before. This was a series made for DVD as each season puts a gun to your head and forces you to buy the next one. I need to see S3 just to find out what's going (gone) on!!!

Finally I came across this statistic in the paper on Monday.

"HALF of all wives fantasise about sex with other men within two years of getting married but only three in 10 act on them, a poll of 6,300 20 to 38-year-old women showed."

Only 3 in 10. I know it's not a large survey but that's 30%. Definatley an example of when wording is key!

Spiderwatch:-
Just the one so far, caught it right above my bed on the ceiling last night. Fast little bugger as well. Maybe he was waiting for me to go to sleep before pouncing...

Profound Lyric of the Day:
It’s a sad sad story when a mother will teach her,
Daughter that she ought to hate a perfect stranger.

Not Ready to Make Nice ~ Dixie Chicks

For the unintiated:-


More Dixie Chicks lyrics and videoclips on Lyricspy

Stormy Weather

I feel like a Yo-yo, my net connection seems to last 30 seconds, goes down, comes back up and then goes down again. Obviously this post has been brought to you thanks to notepad and the ability to copy/paste stuff...

...and then catching it on the upswing. I need to check that my enemy is not trying to cut off my lines of communication. Either that or it has something to do with the thunderstorm that's just suddenly appeared out of nowhere outside my window?

Well after last weeks invasion, things seem to have settled down to a war of attrition. Except that I would imagine that ? would lose a war of attrition, there being only one of me and probably an army of several million of them. Still I have manged to remove 2 more of the 8-legged infantry from various corners of my house. Not to call me paranoid, but I do check the ceiling in bedroom before I go to bed as well. ~ Cheers Eileen for putting that happy thought in my head! ;-)

I now have a working washing machine as well. So it turned out to be worth the day-off just get that fixed. I'm glad really, as there was a possibility that the engineer would get here diagnose the problem and then tell me I'd need to wait for delivery of a part! As it was I still had to fork out £90 for a call-out that lasted less than an hour and the fix was just reloading the control software into the machine. Still I have managed to put 2 loads through it today without a problem (apart from those caused by me trying to operate the machine).

On the nearly working front is my bike. I have cleaned it, oiled it and replaced the front brakes + innertube. The rear brakes work, but squeak like a mouse trying to yodel. I'll have to replace those when the bike shop get some more in. The other thing I need to replace is the sadle. I took the bike for a quick run up and down the hill to ensure that I had put everything back together correctly and the saddle just felt like it was made of wood. It's so thin I'm assuming it was invented by an ex-KGB torturer whose's branching out into other areas.

So when I go back for the brakes I'm going to look for a better saddle and also a helmet. Better to be safe rather than sorry, especially with some of the hills round my way. I haven't dared try any yet, but I bet you could get up some speed on the downhill sections.

Thought Provoking Lyric of the Day:
Why must we lose love to ever know love at all? ~ Light of Day - The Divine Comedy

OH what the hell I can't get enough of the chorus either...1...2...3...&

When there's no more lies to hide behind.
And no more tears to cry,
I know we'll be alright.
'Cause even though the skies above are cold and grey.
I'm sure tomorrow we will see the light of day.

I Have Had it with the Motherf**king Spiders in this Motherf**king House

Shamlessly borrowed from Simon!

Okay own up. Who doesn't have their fair share. My house just seems to be awash with spiders at the moment. I know I've complained about living on my own, but that wasn't an open invitation for my eight legged friends to come along and keep me company. I'd just about got rid of all those annoying Thunder Bug type things as well.

But now everytime I come back to my house on an evening I'm finding yet another spider trying to set up residence in one of the numerous corners in my house. I have ... er ... removed at least 7 or 8 so far this week using various means. If I were to detail it all I'd probably sound like a B-Movie version of "Snakes on a Plane" if such a thing is possible.

Also to add to the list of things that have broken in my house - my electic razor has gone on the blink. Which means I'm currently trying to hack my face off every morning with a manual razor. This wouldn't be so bad except I've never used a manual razor in my life. It's always been easier and quicker to use an electric one. so far there's been no blood, but it's always in the back of my mind that maybe I'd do better with sandpaper.

Maybe I should try waxing or something?

I hope to reduce my "broken" list by one early next week. I've got an engineer coming to look at my washer/dryer on Monday. Not before time as well, it actually switched itself on while empty on Monday night. It's currently unplugged to prevent a repeat performance. The really annoying thing though is I've had to take a day off work to get it fixed, so I hope they can do it on the day!

Topical Thought for the Day: At the moment it's currently San Marino 0 - 13 Germany in the football. Sort of puts England 5 - 0 Andorra in perspective doesn't it?

Nothing to see here, move along!

It's been a rather quiet weekend (for once). Unfortunately we had lots of rain yesterday which meant the cadets couldn't actually go gliding. Which was a shame it was nice weather when we drove to the airfield. Unfortunately just before the first cadets went up the heavens opened. We stayed around for a couple of hours to see if the weather would break, but by lunchtime it had just gotten worse. The day wasn't a total loss for the Cadets. They each got to beat me senseless at Tony Hawk for the PS one (a skateboarding game).

Which was nice. The only other bits of news are rather short.

1. I now own a bike. It used to be my dad's but he hasn't used it in a while so I bought it off him. It needs a bit of work, but nothing tot serious. I managed to fix most of it this morning, it only requires a new innertube at the front. I can now explore the area better than I can on foot and maybe see what lies beyond those parts of the village that are too far to walk on an evening and are inaccessible by car.

2. I finally got it. That f*$king huge spider that's been running around my living room I finally managed to catch it just now. I'm sorry, but it didn't survive the encounter. My nerves are not strong enough where spiders are concerned (especially when they are that big).

They are my krypronite!