And Now For Something Completely Different

Or - The Lighter Way To Enjoy Blogging

Looking back over the last few posts they've been... er... heavy to say the least. So tonight, sit back and enjoy Views from the Hill Top Lite...

Views From The Hillock

I was considering views from a mole hill, but moles are blind, so the view wouldn't be very far. Speaking of mole hills, I finally got round to tidying up my garden last weekend. Well, as tidy as I could make it before the rain hit. Here's another reason I blog - to confess my sins. I hadn't actually got the lawnmower out so far this year up until that point (slaps wrist).

Unfortunately for me "The Lawnmower was not enough!" (That sounds like a James Bond Film staring Alan Titchmarsh). I really needed a scythe for my lawn. The grass was so long, i'm not joking, if I didn't have the orange power cord to follow I could of lost my mower in my backgarden. But I resisted the temptation to buy a scythe in the end and just struggled with the mower.

The more I think about it, the cooler it sounds to "own a scythe" I mean the temptation would just be too great to wander round in a black robe (with hood) muttering "Cower mortals, it is now your time". Personally I blame Pratchett.

Anyway, I fought off the varied denziens of my garden to cut the grass to a respectable height, but it was very hard work. The "Hover mower" didn't really hover, I would of needed a helicopter to succeed with that feat. No, it was sheer brute strength in the end. I was hoping to find some Spinach growning in my garden. If TV has taught me anything it is that eating spinach will allow me feats of strenth beyond meer mortals, but not beyond Uri Geller .

On Monday I finally purchased a floor for my bathroom. I was undecided between wood laminate and tiles, so I went for both. I have bought some lamintate flooring that looks like white slate tiles. So my floor look like it has been tiled, but the laminate is much easier to lay. What's even better is that it's much easier to cut to shape to go round things such as the toilet and the sink. I'm going to try and lay this all by myself, it looks easy enough, but I also know those are the last words of the DIY amateur.

Also on the bathroom front, I used my new shower for the first time today. It has been a month since I last had a working shower and I've been chomping at the bin to get my new shower up and working. Unfortunately I've had to wait for the tiling to be finished and then wait 10 days before I could use it. I bought a shower curtain rail (and curtain) on Sunday and installed them almost immediately. So it's just been a waiting game until this morning.

Let's just say, that this mornings shower felt like one of the best ever. I could have stayed under it all day.

Finally here's a rumour you won't hear anywhere else. John Woo is to write and direct a live action adaptation of Disney's Bambi. This is due to the success of other Live action flicks that Disney has had recently, think Pirates of The Caribbean. I know, I know, this seems really far fetched, but if you don't believe me, check out the picture below.

I can just imagine the dialog now:-

"You killed my mother!" Followed by the hunter's beerkeg exploding in a shower of grenade shrapnel!

Or how about...

"Don't call me Flower" It turns out the skunk is homophobic, has a flick knife and isn't afraid to use it!

I can just see the little tagline that comes with the age certificate. This film contains scenes of mild animal peril, extreme violence and scenes of a discovery channel type sexual nature!

I vote for Bruce Willis to be the voice of Bambi.